Keeping up with life is exhausting. My mind is overflowing with unorganized lists of every email I need to send and every phone call I need to make and the people I need to see and the errands I need to run.
I desperately need some margin in my life.
I’m still working on setting goals for this year. One category of my life that I’m trying to work on is my community involvement. The reason I moved here was to become a part of the community that I was serving. Kinship, as Gregory Boyle would put it. Now, I do work and go to church in my neighborhood, as well as mentor several area teen girls, but I want to expand my network and really get to know my neighbors who are not attending my church or not affiliated with my work or volunteer organizations. A couple ways I’ve considered doing this are through attending neighborhood association meetings and attending the weekly coffee hour hosted by a community housing group.
Tonight I went to help out at a local high school for a Financing College event, but I ended up sitting around for an hour with nothing to do. Right before I was getting ready to leave, another volunteer started talking to me and asked if I had a long drive home. I told her that I live in the neighborhood, and it turns out that she’s one of my neighbors! She immediately invited me to the next neighborhood association meeting and got my contact info so that I could be added to the email list.
I left work today feeling discouraged with how little I accomplished, but I arrived home feeling so encouraged and blessed. I believe that 2012 is going to be a really good year.
I just had a wonderful weekend away in the city that used to be mine with the friends who got me through college. It was so refreshing to leave the stress of a new job and to talk about our goals for the coming months and years.
I am exhausted. But I am also very inspired and grateful.
I greeted 2011 with exhaustion and frustration. I did my best to make it through each day. But 2012 is a new year in so many ways. I have a new job. I’m starting to dream again—dreams for my life and dreams for my community.
I don’t really make resolutions, but I’m working on putting together a list of goals for this year…
Someday I may learn how to pack and sleep in the same evening.
I’ve been in a conversation with God most of this month. I have been going back and forth between praising Him for His goodness and asking Him why everything seems to happen with such “bad timing”. I’ve said this before, but it’s become very evident that God’s timing is not my timing. Even so, I find myself longing for everything around me to stop so that I can have the energy to discern what God is doing. But God works in the midst of the chaos, maybe even through the chaos.
Lord, please help me sleep tonight.
God is so gracious to me. I have been overwhelmed and distant and detached from Him, but He has gently pursued me. He awakened my senses to His presence in the least likely places, when I was just going though the motions and trying to make it through another day. He used me to speak to others’ hearts and touched mine in the process.
Wow! I definitely believe that divine appointments happen. I’ve experienced two absolutely crazy ones over the past couple of weeks. I wonder if God is moving in a special way or if I am just more in tune with His Spirit?
-family: so many hard times, but so much closer now
-community: to be a part of something bigger than myself
-work: keeps me humble and busy
-friends: to be known by others is sweet
-education: preparing me for greater things
-Redeemer: continues to lift me up and give my life meaning
My throat is so sore I feel like I could swallow a thousand waterfalls without getting any relief.
Apparently working has been hazardous to my intellectual health. I am failing at writing simple sentences.
I just want to be challenged, to grow, and to use all the talents that God has given me. I realize that there are seasons in life, but I’m afraid that a huge part of me is dying as each day passes.
After every meal, my tío always say, “Panza llena; corazón contento.” This roughly translates to: “full stomach, happy heart.” Tonight I realized that it isn’t just the eating that makes his heart happy; it’s the act of bringing la familia (more than just relatives) together and conviviendo (sharing life).
I think I’m in need of some adventure.